love letters
by seemslikeaporno
Summary: Because passing notes is overrated. / Beck&Tori, oneshot.


**love letters**

**notes**: i - i can't believe it. i actually wrote tori/beck FLUFF. pure, unadulterated, FLUFF. i don't know whether to be proud or to be worried. this is written in a letter format (which, yes, i know, is completely unoriginal and has probably been done a thousand times before - but i really wanted to try it out, so i did and there's no going back now). if you don't like things written in this particular format, then you probably shouldn't read it, unless you want to rip your hair out and flame me for writing this, which would be so (not) cool. anyways, for those of you who enjoy stories like this: happy reading! :)  
**summary**: _because passing notes is overrated._  
**disclaimer**: victorious is not mine.

.

Dear Beckett,

When are you going to tell Jade to stop trying to sabotage me during class?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Name one time when Jade's sabotaged you, aside from the time in drama when she poured coffee on your head.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Today, in history class when she put gum in my hair before I had to present a project, and yesterday, when she _purposely_ knocked your lemonade onto my lap, the day before that, when she pretended to trip and ripped my shirt, and the day before _that_ when I asked her to hold my bag and she "accidentally" spilled all of my things onto the floor. Is that enough for you?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I'll talk to her.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Thanks oodles! :)

From, Tori

**x **

Dear Beckett James Oliver III,

I am bored.

From, Victoria Vega I

.

Dear Victoria Vega I,

That's PRINCE Beckett James Oliver III to you. And why might-eth you be-eth bored?

From, Prince Beckett James Oliver III

.

Dear **PRINCE** Beckett James Oliver III,

Fine-eth, then that's BEAUTIFUL SWAN PRINCESS Victoria Vega I to YOU. And I'm just-eth bored-eth. Can't I just-eth be-eth bored-eth?

From, Beautiful Swan Princess Victoria Vega I

.

Dear Beautiful Swan Princess Tori Vega I,

Nay, thou cannot-eth. And why write notes back and forth when we have texting…eth?

From, Prince Beckett James Oliver III

.

Dear Beckett,

Beautiful Swan Princess_ Tori_ Vega I?

You appear-eth-ed to have forgotten my proper name-eth, therefore, you will be banned from my kingdom of Swania Lakia!

And everyone knows that writing notes are more fun, duh-eth.

From, Beautiful Swan Princess Victoria Vega I

.

Dear Tori,

THIS-ETH IS-ETH WAR-ETH, THEN.

From, Prince Beckett James Oliver III

.

Dear He-Who-I-Am-Having-A-War-With,

I WILL-ETH DESTROY YOUR KINGDOM-ETH.

From, Beautiful Swan Princess Victoria Vega I

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Dear She-Who-Will-Lose-This-War,

Oh yeah? WELL I'LL DESTROY YOUR SWAN PETS. ETH.

From, Prince Beckett James Oliver III

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Dear He-Who-Is-Misinformed,

YOU WILL NOT-ETH. D:

From, Beautiful Swan Princess Victoria Vega I

.

Dear She-Who-Is-Seriously-Wrong,

OH, I WILL-ETH, BEAUTIFUL SWAN PRINCESS VICTORIA VEGA I.

From, Prince Beckett James Oliver III

.

Dear Prince Beckett James Oliver III,

You must have called a truce, since you called me by my proper name. I accept it. This war is officially over, and I have claimed victory-eth.

From, Beautiful Swan Princess Victoria Vega I

.

Dear Tori,

Dang it.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

THE WAR IS BACK ON.

From, Beautiful Swan Princess Victoria Vega I

**x **

Dear Tori,

I would really appreciate it if you could give me last night's homework, please.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

You should have done it yourself.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

So that means I can?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Have it back to me before the end of lunch.

From, Tori

**x **

Dear Beck,

What are you doing tomorrow night?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Jade's got to do something with her dad, so nothing. Why?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Why else? There's that new movie coming out – the one with the zombies and the pandas. I want to see it, but André doesn't want to go with me. Will you?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Is that the one with the zombie pandas, or the one where, in the previews, it shows the zombies attacking the pandas?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

The zombie pandas, I think. I don't want to see the one where pandas are killed!

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I'm not going.

From, Beck

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Dear Beck,

PLEASE? _No one_ wants to see it with me!

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

There's a REASON for that. Who wants to watch a movie about zombie pandas? Count me out.

From, Beck

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Dear Beck,

You stink.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Dead pandas stink more.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Touché.

From, Tori

**x**

Dear Beck,

You saw it. :D

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Shut up. I only went because I didn't want to make you feel bad.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

:DDDDDDDDDDD

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I SAID SHUT UP.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

You know you liked it.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I did not!

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Face it. Zombie pandas are cute.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I'm done talking about this.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

You know they are Beck – face it, you LOVE zombie pandas!

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

…They were only a LITTLE cute, OKAY?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

:D

From, Tori

**x**

Dear Tori,

I have a very important and exponentially serious question.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

What?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Why do we keep writing in this letter format? I mean, it's not like we're ever sitting more than two seats away from each other anytime we pass notes.

From, Beck

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Dear Beck,

Everyone knows that writing letters is much more fun than passing notes. Besides, letters have a deeper meaning.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Oh yeah? And what kind of "deeper meaning" do letters have?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Well, in letters you call each other "dear".

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

That's just a formality.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Maybe you're just a formality.

From, Tori

.

Maybe you are.

…

Dear Tori,

You're right. Letters are cooler.

From, Beck

**x**

Dear Beck,

…I heard that you and Jade broke up again. Because of me.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

…Yeah, you heard right.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

I'm really sorry. If there's any way I can help fix it, just tell me.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

It's okay. I saw it coming, anyways. It's not all your fault. She just couldn't handle me getting close to another girl.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

I'm still sorry. And oh, we're close now? ;)

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Don't go taking that the wrong way, now, missy. ;)

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

That's Beautiful Swan Princess Victoria Vega I, to you.

From, Tori

**x **

To Miss Victoria Vega:

You have an appointment with Mr. Beckett Oliver at the lunch table by the door at 12:15 today. Can you still make it to this appointment? If not, we will reschedule with his secretary.

Beckett Oliver, PhD

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RE: To Miss Victoria Vega:

Mr. Beckett Oliver, I would attempt to make that appointment if…YOU WEREN'T GOING TO BE ARRESTED FOR IMPERSONATING A DOCTOR!

Tori Vega, FBI Agent

.

RE: RE: To Miss Victoria Vega:

Yeah, but YOU'RE impersonating an FBI Agent, which is PUNISHABLE BY LAW.

Beckett Oliver, PhD

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RE: RE: RE: To Miss Victoria Vega:

But you've forgotten – MY DAD'S A COP. He appointed me as an FBI Agent, and now I'm going to arrest you.

Tori Vega, FBI Agent

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RE: RE: RE: RE: To Miss Victoria Vega:

I can work out a deal with you, if you'll meet me at the lunch table by the door at 12:15. I have something you might want.

Beckett Oliver, PhD

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RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: To Miss Victoria Vega:

Alright – but you've got to promise to keep this under wraps. Got it? I'll meet you there.

Tori Vega, FBI Agent

**x**

Dear Beck,

I have good news and I have bad news. Which do you want to hear first?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Good?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

The good news is, I bought ice cream last night for us to have when you come over later today. The bad news is, we actually have to work on our history project while we eat it. :(

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

That's blasphemy! I don't want history and ice cream at the same time. I'll get overloaded.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Haha! What are you, a computer?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

DOES NOT COMPUTE.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

You know, computers can't eat ice cream.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

You know, I'm not your average computer. ;)

From, Beck

**x **

Dear Tori,

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

What brought that on?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I don't know. I started to write something else, then realized you looked pretty today. :)

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

YOU ROCK.

Love, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

And what brought that on?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Well, I just looked at you, then remembered that you rock. ;)

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I was talking about the "love, Tori" thing at the end. Do you _loooove_ me or something, Tori?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Get over yourself. :)

Love, Tori

**x **

Dear Beck and Tori,

You have detention this afternoon for passing notes in class. Have fun!

From, Sikowitz

**x **

Dear Beck,

I feel like a bad kid. :(

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Don't worry about it. Jade and I used to get detention all the time.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

That's because you and Jade are bad kids. My parents are going to be mad!

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

If you were more concerned, I doubt you'd be passing notes during detention while the teacher has his back turned.

From, Beck

.

Dear Tori,

That didn't mean you should stop answering me.

From, Beck

**x **

Dear Beck,

I got grounded for getting detention. And it's all your fault. :(

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

How is it my fault? You're the one who started passing notes in the first place

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

BUT YOU **ANSWERED**.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

But YOU sent them FIRST.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

It's still your fault, because I said so. So there. :P

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Yeah, well, world hunger is YOUR fault. Piggy. ;)

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

IS THAT A FAT JOKE?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Well, it wouldn't be, if you hadn't eaten most of the ice cream last week.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

You stink more than zombie pandas.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

At least I wouldn't eat them. ;)

From, Beck

**x**

Dear Beckett,

Do you have any gum?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I ran out when you asked last period. Why do you want so much today, anyways?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Because gum is fantastic, that's why.

Actually, I'm a little nervous about improv today. Jade is supposed to be in my group, and she's still really mad at me for…well, you know.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

You mean, for something you didn't do? Don't worry, you'll be fine, I promise.

And if she tries to pour coffee on your head again, I'll be sure to stop her. No worries. :)

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Because you did SUCH a good job last time.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I got a kiss out of it in the end, so I guess I did _something_ right.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

I didn't.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

And why is that?

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

You sir, are a bad kisser. ;)

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Go get eaten by a zombie panda.

From, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

You even have them as pets now?

From, Tori

**x **

Dear Beck,

Hi.

Love, Tori

P.S. You owe me four dollars for paying for your lunch today.

.

Dear Tori,

Hello.

Love, Beck

P.S. I know, I know. I'll have it by tomorrow. Why are you so concerned about it, anyway? _You_ ate most of my lunch.

.

Dear Beck,

Yo.

Love, Tori

P.S. Yeah, well, you still had to take my money to buy it. Without me, you wouldn't have had a lunch at all! Besides, you said that you didn't really like pizza, so I just helped you finish it. ;)

.

Dear Tori,

Hola.

Love, Beck

P.S. I said that I didn't like _pepperoni_ on my pizza. Then you just decided to take a whole slice of it. I mean, maybe I just wanted to give you the pepperoni! You're depleting the world's food supply day by day, Tori Vega. I'm shaking my head as I write.

.

Dear Beck,

Konichiwa.

Love, Tori

P.S. I didn't hear that. And I'm totally not depleting the world's food supply! Just yours. And I was watching you the whole time you were writing, and you definitely weren't shaking your head as you wrote, Beck Oliver. That was a total lie. Jesus will probably smite you for that.

.

Dear Tori,

Bonjour.

Love, Beck

P.S. I was metaphorically shaking my head, obviously. Don't you know that most people do things metaphorically in this day and age? And while I might be smited for lying metaphorically, you're going to get smited for glutton. :D

.

Dear Beck,

Greetings.

Love, Tori

P.S. Beck, "smited" isn't a word. So you've obviously failed, and I'm going to win this argument. Jesus is probably planning on smiting you at this very instant. I'm sure you led an awesome life though, with your cool zombie pandas and your ex-girlfriend and your boots.

.

Dear Tori,

Hi.

Love, Beck

P.S. Well, with my awesome power, I _made_ smited a word. Therefore, you have failed for not realizing that, and Jesus will soon smite you, instead. And even if I do get smited, I would have led an even more awesome life if SOMEONE would stop stealing my pizza.

.

Dear Beck,

Hey.

Love, Tori

P.S. _Suuure_ you did, Beck. And Jesus won't smite ME. I'm too good. And, technically, that pizza was mine, since it was _my_ money you used to buy it with.

.

Dear Tori,

I'm out of original greetings.

Love, Beck

P.S. Just because you let me borrow the money doesn't mean you could borrow the pizza, too.

.

Dear Beck,

Me too.

Love, Tori

P.S. I can borrow whatever I want, if my money paid for it. :D

.

Dear Tori,

Yep.

Love, Beck

P.S. Alright, so when I return the money, does that mean I get a slice of pizza?

.

Dear Beck,

Uh-huh.

Love, Tori

P.S. …I don't really know.

.

Dear Tori,

Goodbye. :)

Love, Beck

P.S. Guess you didn't think that through too well.

.

Dear Beck,

Ciao.

Love, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Au revior.

Love, Beck

P.S. So NOW we're trying to think of original goodbyes?

**x**

Dear Beck,

I heard Jade asked you back out.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I said no.

Love, Beck

**x **

Dear Tori,

Have you been avoiding me?

Love, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

No way! I haven't been avoiding you. Really, I haven't. At all. What gave you that idea?

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

You keep running in the opposite direction when I try to talk to you. What gives?

Love, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

…Okay, I've been avoiding you. But it's for a good reason! Jade wants to kill me, I think!

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

She does not. And if she tries, I'll protect you.

Love, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Oh, so now you're my knight in shining armor or something? Haha.

From, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

I'm Prince Beckett James Oliver III, actually, but you were close. ;)

Love, Beck

**x **

Dear Tori,

I think I'm in love with you.

Love, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

I _know_ you're in love with me.

Love, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

And how do you know that?

Love, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Because I love you, too, even though you stink worse than zombie pandas.

Love, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

So, because you love me, I automatically have to love you? Even though you're a piggy?

Love, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Yes – because I love you even though you're a bad kisser and you think zombie pandas are cute and you wear boots every day, so you have to love me. It's in the rules of life.

Love, Tori

.

Dear Tori,

Alright, then. Tori Vega, I love you, even though you eat my pizza and my ice cream and call me names and try to have me arrested for impersonating doctors.

Love, Beck

.

Dear Beck,

Good. :)

Love, Tori

**x **

Dear Tori and Beck,

I'm happy that you've figured out your feelings.

You'll have plenty of time to talk about them after serving detention the rest of the week for passing notes in class _again_.

Love, Sikowitz


End file.
